Rules for Other Parents

Things I wish I’d had the guts to say.

  1. When in an eating establishment with only one high chair, do not keep possession of the high chair if you and your child are done eating and are just staring off into space doing nothing, and there are other children balanced precariously on laps or adult chairs trying to eat. Go on, clean off that high chair and offer it to your neighbor!

  2. When in an eating establishment with a limited number of toys, don’t hog all the toys when other children arrive. Offer to share with your neighbor!

  3. While in a poorly ventilated play area, gabbing with your friends, if you continue to smell poop for more than a few minutes, please consider that it might be your child’s diaper that needs attention!

  4. Watch your children while at the playground. At least glance over at them every few minutes or so. I’m busy watching my own child and can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to rescue yours when that other kid, whose parents aren’t watching her either, hits/pushes/runs over your children.

  5. If my child is over on the other side of the sandbox with his back toward your child, not showing the remotest bit of interest in what you are doing, please don’t use him as a prop for teaching your child how to share. It just confuses everyone.